Monday, December 10, 2007

Overwhelmed and Under Energized (?)

No pictures. It's dark when I leave for work and dark when I get home and done feeding all my critters. I bought a 'head lamp' so that I can see what I'm doing when I'm feeding in the dark and still have my hands free. I'm thinking I may have too many critters. This is exhausting! By the time I get home from work and get all the animals fed, it's only an hour or two before my bedtime ~ so that I can get up early and do it all again. I haven't even put up any Christmas decorations!! Christmas is my favorite holiday and I usually have my house decked out like a 'Country Home' magazine spread! I have an extensive collection of hand selected, old fashioned, ornaments and a gorgeous, huge, artificial tree that I usually have up by Thanksgiving ~ not to mention a vast array of treasured figurines and assorted other special decorations that I've gathered over the years. This year, nothing. I'm too tired.

I'm Not depressed. I'm just wore out from trying to do everything by myself. (Don't anyone ever tell my ex-husband that I said that!!!!)

If I can just get through the next few weeks, things will lighten up. I'll take my breeding groups apart, which will put me back down to two groups to feed and water ~ right now I'm doing FIVE. WAY too many when I have to haul hay and chop ice for each group! I'm thinking a rather significant flock reduction may be in order in 2008...

Unfortunately, breeding season coincides with my company's busiest time at work so there's no time off and no 'leaving early'. I was lucky that they let me leave for Katie's graduation but now I haven't had (and won't have) a day off until the week of Christmas. I don't even LIKE working ~ let alone working 7 days a week!! What I'm finding is ~ I have no time to ENJOY the Christmas SEASON. THAT is sad.

Bella had her surgery (spayed) on Friday. I took her in before ~ and picked her up after work. The Elizabethan collar that they sent her home with was too small and the second night (at 3 o'clock in the morning) I could feel her licking at her stitches. (she sleeps with me) I turned the light on and sure enough, she was able to get at the incision, even with her "hat" on. There was some bleeding and I was scared that she'd have to go back to the vet. I was able to blot the area and fortunately, had a larger Elizabethan collar in the garage ~ from when Sadie had her surgery a couple of years ago. So, at three o'clock in the morning, I'm trying to remove one Elizabethan collar and replace it with a larger one ~ on a young dog that does NOT want to wear one in the first place! Mission accomplished but my alarm going off at 5 a.m. was not a happy sound...

Bella is still not sleeping well. Which, of course, means that ?I'm not sleeping well. She must be feeling some discomfort and she definitely wants to lick her belly and bottom and is very frustrated that she can't. I'm just tired.

I don't mean this to be a 'whining' session. I just wanted to explain why I'm not posting. There just isn't any time! I haven't done any knitting or spinning either. Which is probably a good thing because my elbow is really bad again...

Things will lighten up soon. I'm going to TRY really hard to get a tree up. Not sure when because I truly don't have any days off work ~ but I'll try.

Katie's coming home for Christmas (12 days!!!!!!!!) and I want some sort of festive spirit in the house. I WILL be able to have some time off when she's here because it's after our peak/rush season at work. So ~ there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I just have to keep plodding along.

Thanks for letting me vent!


  1. Carol6:18 AM

    Wow. 5 breeding groups is a lot of groups to manage. I certainly can understand how hard it is to keep up on the chores with limited day light to work with. If and when you do reduce your flock, there will certainly be some handsome sheep available for those who love the HST markings that you breed for.

    I find myself thinking about cutting back to 6 or 7 ewes and two rams. Not so much because of the work at this time of year. Mostly because of lambing and summer grazing. My flock needs to be a size where it is more fun than worry.

    Your goats are adorable by the way. And I hope Bella heals up and sleeps better soon.


  2. Anonymous3:06 PM

    Just between you and me, I think Christmas should be moved to January. What I want to know is:
    Who authorized Christmas to be on December 25...anyway? I say you celebrate your Christmas on January 25th this year. People get too overwhelmed by the hard work it takes to have "fun".
    I admire your committment to your animals. And reading this entry in your blog makes me wonder if I could ever pull off having sheep by myself someday. Thanks for sharing your honest feelings about work--both your job and your farm.
    Nancy, may you have a decent night's sleep in the next few days!

  3. Anonymous3:19 PM

    It probably just itches a little because it is healing. It is a major surgery (she just had her ovaries and uterus removed, same process as in humans), she probably is a little sore (did they send pain meds home?) Try putting some bitter apple spray on it to discourage the licking.

    Kelly V

  4. Anonymous8:45 PM

    Hang in there Mom! Don't worry about having things all festive when I get there, maybe we can start a new tradition... Christmas Eve, we pop in a Grey's DVD, open some wine, and decorate till we fall asleep, then wake up and see the "present" we left. :)

  5. Anonymous8:47 PM

    May I recommend something, Nancy? Giving YOURSELF the gift of a year off from decorating this year. I tried to "do it all, by myself" when I was working and putting myself through school. I was miserable and exhausted and performing poorly on all fronts until I cut myself some slack. Last year was the first year in a really long time that I put up a tree. My carefully collected decorations were still lovely, despite living in storage so very long. For me, rest/relaxation was more important, even though I missed my domestic traditions.

    I pray that you will be kind to yourself this season, and find joy and refreshment in your celebrations.

    very truly yours,
    Angela Rountree

  6. I'm WAY ahead of you (she says with a snort); we have our tree up in the corner -- with no decorations! And I don't know when/if we will find time to put any on it. And with a young pup in the house it would be pointless/dangerous to decorate the bottom third or put presents under it, so maybe we'll just go for the natural look. Too bad we paid for a tree; if we were going for a natural look we probably could have found a FREE scraggly Douglasfir growing somewhere! Oh well.

    And I don't blame Christmas for being too early; I blame Thanksgiving for being too late! Whose idea was it to schedule the two biggest holidays one month apart? If we had Thanksgiving the first weekend of October like the Canadians do, we'd have a little more breathing room.

    (I'm surprised your post didn't end with Dream saying, "Well, you didn't HAVE to add three goats to your list of animals!" Did you have her gagged?)

  7. Kelly V1:08 PM

    Michelle, that last one on Dream says was very good, got a good laugh out of me :-)

  8. Nancy, I compromised! My dogs like to attack the cut tree and eat the tinsel and ornaments (none ingested just chewed on). Rather than have a 'fake' one, or spending the time to get a cut one, I just orderd and received a 7ft tall Norfolk Pine (I've seen them mature out in CA). I have Corgi ornaments on it so far, and i'll use this for YEARS! Heck the ornaments might even stay on it year round LOL. I have tons of stuff to decorate wtih, but my excuse is the dogs would get to it :) Good luck!

  9. Xmas used to my favorite holiday too. But as things changed in my life, it no longer is. I quit decorating completely and now don't miss it a bit. While everyone else is whining about having to take DOWN their decorations...I'm yelling "HALLELUIA" that I didn't decorate! LOL

    Here's to all the Ebenezer Scrooges in the world! :-)


  10. Nancy: try not to stress. You definitely are trying to do way too much (we all have that problem). Just put up enough decorations to get you in the spirit and I'm sure Katie would love to put up the rest when she comes home. That might be a fun thing for the two of you to do together. Just keep getting as much sleep as you can and eat right so you keep up your nutrition (hint: those pizzas you love so much are not really that nutritous). Get yourself some vitamin C to boost your immune system and make a list of all your blessings and tape it to your cappuchino mix so you see it every morning (I know you can't get the day started without your capp). Also, make a short list of the fun things you plan to do when you get done with this long stretch of working, that always helps me to focus on the light at the end of the tunnel. I'll be thinking of you. Becca



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